Everything you ever wanted to know about goblins, from the Dragon Garage Appendices

Heroic Journey's Bestiary entry for Goblins, embedded with Dragon Garage. Because every fantasy book should have appendices:

Ur-goblins are bred for war by unscrupulous sorcerers, warlocks & witches, and can often be found in service to them; tree goblins and faerie gobelin (also known as pukwudgies) infest dark forests and often live in harmony with giant spiders. They are shunned by other faeries, and a war of pranks between the factions has been going on since Puk spiked the solstice brew at the Third Age Conjunction.

Goblins

Also known as orcus or cowcaddens, goblins are an unopopular species of nocturnal scavengers, known for their pasty white skin, clawed hands and feet, sharp yellow teeth, pointed ears and poor hygiene. Their eyesight is weak in daylight, but tapetum lucidum give them excellent night vision, complimented by keen hearing.

There are many subspecies, ranging from enormous deep cave monstrosities to winged imps (also known as pukwudgies), which engage in endless intercenine warfare. Long ago, scheming sorcerers interbred the worst and most brutish of humankind with goblins to produce the dread ur-goblins (war goblins), the only breed that can withstand sunlight without flinching.

Commonly found in northern and temperate climes, they dwell in marginal lands, such as hills, haunted forests, mildewy caves, dank ruins and windy mountains.

Goblins are known to partner with other foul species, such as dire wolves, serpents, dragons, bats and gaint spiders. They battle their mutual sworn enemies: humans, dwarves and (especially) elves. Dire wolf packs and spider clutches provide muscle and speed in exchange for goblin ingenuity, tool making and magics.

The deep blood hatred between goblins and elves goes back eons, and the origins of this mutual hatred has been lost to time.

Goblins have been known to form mercenary companies with humans, trolls, man-eating ogres and rogue faeries, but never elves or dwarves, whose company they cannot abide. Goblin mercenaries have been known to attack during daylight hours in order to catch villagers off guard.

Underground, goblins live on magical ghost fungus and lichens that exist in great plenty. Some are highly nutritious (if tough and tasteless) or poisonous; goblin shamans know which is which, and are experts at combining them into formidable potions. Cabbage, salt and garlic are often used in both food and potions.

Their society is pitiless, cruel and tribal: the weak are either purged (to avoid waste of resources), or used as ‘cannon fodder’ in battle. Cannibalism often occurs when mushroom crops fail.

Goblin armour is often brittle, as their smiths cannot match the level of skill their elven or dwarven counter- parts. Poison and dark enchantments can help compensate. They steal elven armour whenever possible.

Great Cave Goblins and Huppudums are sightless albino subspecies that live deep beneath the surface of the earth, and are allergic to sunlight. They bathe frequently and cover themselves with mud and shroompaste to cover their scent. Their tongue clicking can often be heard reverberating throughout vast underground caverns.

Dark lords (such as vampire, necromancers, evil princes, sorcerers, witches and evil spirits) often employ goblin armies, luring them with promises of vengeance against their ancestral enemies, or of gold and fertile land. As vampires are unable to digest goblin blood, and goblins cannot be infected with the vampire virus, the two species are frequent allies.

Goblins do not tan; sunlight burns their skin; if they must move about during daylight hours, it will be when it is cloudy or after imbibing fortifying mushroom brews.

Their language, Gobblese, is harsh and guttural; some say it is derived from elvish, which envious goblins stole and then bastardized.

Eternal opportunists, goblins will exploit any weakness they are presented with. They often loot battlefields for weapons, armour and food, unless ghouls get there first.

Goblins typically serve the narrative function of antagonist cannon fodder: pitiless, evil beings that can be smote in vast numbers without incurring guilt or moral judgement.

Faerie goblins may hold out wishes, but these will always come with a completely annihilating cost.

As an externalization and embodiment of human flaws, they relish in cruelty, sadism, greed, cowardice and selfishness.

They are the ying to the player yang. 

Players cannot be goblins.